iaremyne.

#loveminusone

Parenting 101.

People always talk about how children break their parents’ hearts by being disrespectful, spoilt or obnoxious. Perhaps they pick up bad habits or refuse to go to school and get the worse grades. And parents would lament on how they work so very hard to pay for their education and give them the best that money can afford so that they never have to suffer unnecessarily. It has always been our fault, our shortcomings, our inability to surpass some benchmark that has always been beyond our reach.

But like many things in life, there must be two sides to a story, different points of views, that if one party can be at fault, so can the other.

Why don’t people try to see things from the child’s point of view? And please don’t give me that children can’t possibly be right because they are too young/they have yet to see the world, therefore their arguments are invalid. That is utter and complete bullshit. Every living person has opinions, rights, principles, beliefs. No matter age, race or cultural background, we are not meant to be pushed around just because we are young.

 

Just like how we break our parents’ hearts, don’t they realise that sometimes they break ours?

That sometimes our efforts go unnoticed, that for some reason, they have the God-given right to not have to say thank you, please, sorry. That they have this incessant need to be right that they would flog a dead argument to its second death just so that they can have the last word. That they do not see that we do study hard, that we do the little things, that we try our best not to tell lies, to be on our best behaviour, to make them proud.

 

That you should trust us. Trust what we say, that we are capable of making the best decisions, or even if we don’t – to learn from it. That your reassuring hand will always be there to guide us, to patch us up should we fall?

 

That we make mistakes and that we are sorry. That we should be forgiven, and that every wrongdoing shouldn’t be magnified ten times over to make us feel like shit. That we are not slaves. That it is perfectly okay to make polite requests to do house chores rather than shouting it. That sometimes it is alright if you make a mistake as long as you say sorry.

 

That we want you to sit and talk to us, to believe in our maturity, or at the very least trust the hand, your hand that brought us up! That there is no need for condescending tones or cruel name-calling. There is no need to crush our hopes and dreams just because they are not in sync with yours. There is no need to always be right.

That we hate being compared, because we are unique in our own right. That we feel like shit too when we get bad grades, that our white lies are unintentional, that nothing makes us happier than to have your complete and unquestionable support through everything in our lives. That we want/need you to be our no. 1 fans, every single day. That we want you to hold us, to tell us that you love us that no matter what, no matter how many times we screw up, you will always be there.

 

That though you are our parents, we are not meant to place you on a pedestal and worship you.

 

Don’t you know that we love you? And we are aware, that we know full well that you love us too?

If you can argue that children screw their parents over time after time, why can’t you say the same for them?

 

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Comments
  1. Fanaticon Seer 19th July 2012 on 4:04 pm Reply

    Dear mun yee….The issue you are addressing has to do with ego.Parents are hardwired to dominate their child until a certain degree.The extreme one end up being labeled as child abuse while the rest go silent.I agree that what you say is really true.But as I am obviously trolling here so if you do happen to be a parent someday just refer back here when you feel nostalgic =)

  2. J'son 30th August 2012 on 10:30 am Reply

    I know how you feel so you arent alone :)

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