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Bella, What is Heaven like?

In loving memory of Bella. 14.02.11 - 16.09.14

In loving memory of Bella.
                                                                                           14.02.12 – 16.09.14

Dear Bella,

It’s been a year since you left us. How have you been?

What is heaven like? Is it fun? Does it have air-conditioning and infinite treats? Do angels play fetch with you and let you watch television all day?

Do you still look the same? Does your paws still smell like baby powder and vanilla?

Do you miss Mummy, Daddy, and Ah Bi?

Do you miss me?

Do you think about us as much as we think about you?

 

Since you left, we have been alright.

Daddy still likes to look at pretty aunties and Mummy still get jealous. They are more concious of their health now, after several hospital scares. They still bicker but they always make up – that’s what matters at the end of the day.

Ah Bi is doing great in Canada. Still scoring the good grades but not the girls. He came back to visit last month. I think he was expecting to come back to a fur-ball of energy and not ashes in an urn.

It’s been a year but it’s still difficult to look at your photos and not miss you.

As for me, I am doing okay.

I became a writer, Bella! You would have been so proud. I remember how I used to read my pieces to you and you would nip my toes in approval.

I met someone who taught me how to smile and laugh again. I told him all about you – and though he has never met you, he loves you already.

I am sure you would have liked him.

Some days when I feel down, I try to look for the silver linings among storm clouds. I am still learning to love myself and be more forgiving of my failures.

I have all these aspirations and goals but really, I am just trying my best to be the person that you think I am.

 

Sometimes I wonder, what if I’d tried harder?

What if I wasn’t so caught up in the breakup or Ah Bi leaving?

What if I’d noticed that something was wrong sooner rather than lie in bed all day crying over a boy who no longer loves me?

What if I’d spent less time listening to his dial tone and more effort on looking for other vets?

What if I’d tried just a little bit harder to keep you safe and happy like I’d promised you?

 

Dear God, if I promise to try harder, would you let me try again?

 

 

You know how we are are put on Earth to learn how to love one another?
I suppose that explains why dogs leave us so soon – they already know how to do that.

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Comments
  1. Dennis Persson 17th September 2015 on 12:44 am Reply

    Love in unconditional. But failures are part of life, it is what makes us human. From that we have to learn from put failures. As long as we do that we will always be alright.

    Speaking of myself. Short life of 35 so far, I have learned that the sooner a bad relationship end the sooner I can move on and waste less time. Myself I wasted 8 years in the wrong relationship, my best years of youth from today perspective. Feel terrible about it but people have stayed a lot longer in bad relationships, even abusive once.

    Remember, there are far more ups in life than downs. Bella certainly know that. You known that is true.

    Take care my friend.
    /Dennis

    • Mehmet 18th February 2016 on 4:47 pm Reply

      در 6:21 pmmahnaz میگوید:man 24 smaale darama rshad mikhunam be yeki az hamkelasiam ke 28 saleshe shadidan alaghe mand shodam injur ke malume ishun ham az man badeshun nemiad ama malume khejalati hastan va pa pish nemizaran age man beheshun pishnehad bedam khieli bad mishe? moshtaghim ya gheire msotaghim kodum behtar?

  2. T.Hemaavathy 17th September 2015 on 8:33 am Reply

    My dearest MunYee,
    You are already trying harder than before when you had the thought of trying again. There is no need for a promise.

    Take care, love.

  3. Roy 18th September 2015 on 4:14 pm Reply

    Very moving. I never knew you had such a cute pet.

  4. Mark McCully 19th September 2015 on 8:09 am Reply

    As a former Marketing Executive, writer and a species from the planet Sarcasm, your letter about passenger 15a was great. I usually smile or smirk, but reading your article I almost laughed out loud. Keep doing what you are doing, albeit suffering for humor, because it is a tough job, but who better? Also, if you could, bring back the ‘chuckle’. Nobody seems to chuckle anymore. I don’t even no where to find a good chuckle. Peace, and next time take the boat ride to Sydney. At least it will only smell like dead fish.

    • Rosie 19th September 2015 on 3:18 pm Reply

      i agree with you! she’s really stupid fucked up chinky lady. she should’ve swim to australia or fly first class instead. stupid bitch trying to put her name in the internet

    • Susana 18th February 2016 on 3:50 pm Reply

      Thanks for your thhugots. It’s helped me a lot.

  5. olga 19th September 2015 on 9:36 am Reply

    I just love your letter to the passenger on 15A. Thank you

    • Divesh 18th February 2016 on 4:06 pm Reply

      Egw thelw na alaksw dtawmio kai na to diakosmiso moni m alla 9elw na ftiaksw i to 1o i to 2o nomizo afta ta dwmatia einai dimiourgies tis neoset! Alla den eimai sigouri an kseri kaneis poias eterias einai mpori na m pei plz?? nikoleta dtawmio p n exei sxesei me mousiki den exw dei parolo pou to epsaksa poli to 9ema dtawmio p n exei sxesi me spor omws exw brei an 9es s stelnw tin istoselida!!!!

  6. Zac 19th September 2015 on 12:25 pm Reply

    Regarding your stupid airplane rant, if it was that bad, why didn’t you speak up for yourself and talk to a flight steward or the guy himself?

    • Rosie 19th September 2015 on 3:19 pm Reply

      because she is stupid as fuck and all she wants is to gain attention in the expense of other people. stupid chinky ass lady,

  7. Rosie 19th September 2015 on 3:16 pm Reply

    Munyee Lau, you are an absolute idiot for allowing such behavior from your fellow passenger in 15A. How do you think writing a letter now is going to change such behavior by someone that we don’t even know?

    All this letter tells us is that you are a passive aggressive #$%$, that doesn’t stand up for yourself when it counts. Disappointing to say the least!

  8. Brian Sonet 20th September 2015 on 1:00 am Reply

    Hi Munyee,

    How are you doing?

    I read your letter to the passenger in 15A and a couple of others that you authored. Your honest thoughts intertwined with humor and compassion helps sustain my faith in humanity and all things fair to complain about in a non-violent manner. Most of all though, I feel your approach helps to cleanse oneself and move on.

    Looking forward to reading your next diatribe :)

    Cheers,
    Brian

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